I called IT services to alert them to the problem. They told me they would send someone over to fix it.
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I waited and waited and finally, two girls showed up. They were official with their uniforms and their magic fix it bag. They opened the front of the copy machine, took one look at scotch tape mess inside and started laughing. Then they poked around in there and discussed their options with each other. They unzipped their official looking bag and pulled out the solution to the problem. It was a roll of black electrical tape.
I was pleasantly surprised to see that their solution was the same as mine.
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