This disgusting creature

has decided to take residence underneath my keyboard at my workplace. I am afraid of lizards because they are like snakes with legs. Therefore I am afraid of geckos because they are like lizards. He sneaks out when I least expect it and scurries across the desk. Then he crawls down the wall behind the desk and I sit there with intense anxiety that he will end up on my leg. Or in my purse. Or some other unwelcome location. Maybe I scream a little bit when he magically appears. Today, when I came into work he was sitting on my pile of rainbow post-it notes. I decided that was a choice place for him because then I can do what I do best: babysit him.

I told him "Stay there on that post-it please Mr. Gecko"

And yes, maybe the gecko listened to me. He was very obedient. He sat on his blue post-it for a long time. And didn't move. At all.

When I went to take him outside where he belongs, I discovered he was dead. Maybe I am not as good of a gecko babysitter as I thought.