The Ten Commandments of Wedding Announcements

By Kirsi and Hannah Banana

After consulting many ettiquette books and analyzing hundreds of wedding announcements, we present our rules. Announcements were graded on a 10 point scale with a point being taken off for each commandment broken. My collection contained only 1 perfect 10. Scary.


1. Thou shalt not have any quotes or poems.


2. Thou shalt have thy picture and announcement facing the same direction. Hence if thy picture is in portrait format, thy announcement shall be also in portrait format.

3. Thou shalt not have thy picture as the background for thy announcement. In this case, two shall not cleave as one.

4. Thou shalt only have one picture, not a collage and both faces must be visible. No side profiles.

5. Thou shalt not change the wording of “we are pleased to announce” to any other adverb including but not limited to ecstatic, overjoyed or anything else exceedingly tacky. To be technically correct, you should say “Mr. and Mrs. Henry Muller have the honor of announcing the marriage of their daughter….”

6. Thou shalt under no circumstances list the location of your registry in your announcement. Registry information is appropriate for a bridal shower invitation only. If you’re still my friend, please read on.

7. Thou shalt state who is invited to attend the wedding by properly addressing the envelope. Hence, if the whole Jones family (including the kids) are invited then don’t address the envelope simply to Mr. and Mrs. Jones. Also, if the Jones kids are not invited to attend then do not address the envelope to The Jones’.

8. Thou shalt wear classy and more formal attire with complementing colors for the photographs. The bride cannot wear stripes and the groom plaid, as that breaks the rules of color swirling.

9. Thou shalt look like you like each other in the photograph but no kissing. Kissing breaks commandment #4 by showing the side profiles.

10. Thou shalt not intentionally flaunt thy engagement ring in the photo. Nobody cares.